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Me, Myself & I

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I am a localization manager/translator and intercultural consultant living in Berlin (Germany), passionate about languages, cultures, diversity management, body art, dancing, self-empowerment, coaching, effective communication and, last but not least, vegan gluten-free food and good movies.

How about you?
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I'm the only person responsible for its content and the views and opinions expressed here are solely mines.
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Wednesday, June 13, 2018

"What are your KPIs for a good bar?", or five questions I get asked a lot on a daily basis and five questions (almost) nobody asks

Do you know a good bar? They ask.

And I go "Well, it depends. What's a good bar, for you?".
And they go "Where we can find good cocktails".

Ah, if just everything in life would be that simple.
A clear question, clear parameters, a clear answer follows, KPIs are fulfilled. Happy ending.

[A good bar? The one with good cocktails, they say.
My favorite one? CafĂ© Morgenrot's Heilige Welt:
Alcohol-free and incredibly sweeeeeet
Image credit: Bustle]

Still, I smile going home, while realizing that I get asked this question almost every single day, even if don't drink alcohol at all. And yet, to most people, I probably look like the kind of gal that goes for shots every single night. (Hint, I never did... but may the force of stereotypes be with you, young Skywalker)

So here you have the five questions I get asked the most, day in and day out, in no particular order:

#1. Do you know a good bar? ("Yes, I do") - (Did I get asked yesterday? Check)
#2. Do you have a cigarette? ("Nope, sorry. I don't smoke" - And nobody believes me) (Did I get asked yesterday? Check)
#3. Where can I find some drugs? ("No idea, sorry" - The same as above)
#4. Where are you from? ("What do you need this information for, right now?" - Puzzled looks follow) (Did I get asked yesterday? Check)
#5. Are your tattoos real? ("Yep, they are") (Did I get asked yesterday? Check)

4/5 within 24 hours is a good ratio, if you ask me.
And here you have five question I almost never get asked and I would love to help people with, in no particular order:

#1. Do you know where the nearest public library is? ("Hell, yes. Just try me")
#2. Do you know where the nearest museum is? ("Hell, yes. Just try me")
#3. Who's your favorite philosopher? ("Depending on the mood of the day, Blaise Pascal, Michel de Montaigne or Friedrich Nietzsche. And yours?")

[Michel Eyquem de Montaigne [1533-1592], 
Lord of Montaigne and author of the 'Essays', 
was a really cool dude]

#4. What do you want to achieve in the next five years? ("That's a great question! Changing the world around me, while working as a coach for diversity management and intercultural communication")
#5. What's the best place to visit in Berlin? (That's the joker question, depending on the person asking it and their needs/taste/way of life)

How about you?
What's your top five, and what those questions could reveal about how people perceive you, at least superficially?

Tags: Questions to get asked for, Where are you from, Weird questions, What not to ask first, Assumptions