Not (too) long ago, and definitely after experiencing many years of having good and not so good friends and charming and not so charming acquaintances, and of dating and being in some kind of relationship with someone, I stumbled upon a concept that changed everything for me:
Don't give part-time people in your life a full-time position in your heart.
If I should re-write this concept while using my own words, I would put is as: "Don't pay that much attention to how much you like someone, pay way more attention to how you like the way they treat you and how they make you feel, instead". Amen.
["Don't give part-time people a full-time position in your life",
or "Don't give part-time people full-time positions in your heart"...
Different words, the same powerful mantra to live by]
I hear you already, telling me things like:
Love is the answer.
Love is there for everyone.
Love can conquer all.
All you need is love.
Sure thing, young Beatles fan. You are right.
Love is the answer.
And we should be able to love everyone, to be kind to everyone, to respect everyone. Without losing ourselves or mistreating ourselves in the process, if you don't mind.
Say, "I love you." Say, "I'm thinking about you." Say, "You've made such a difference in my life." Say, "I'm here for you." Don't wait until tomorrow. Say it today.
Alexandra Franzen
At least to me, it is very important to keep asking yourself where's the love for yourself in this equation, while giving away your time, affection, care, feelings and the best of you to people not willing to appreciate and value it?
[Love is the answer, yes.
But please go get a regular keyboard
for your daily life. It helps]
While dealing with people that we like a lot but that, unfortunately, don't like us as much as we do and are not ready or able to give us what we need and deserve, we are all tempted, at some point, to think that a little bit is better than nothing.
After hitting a wall way too many times and feeling emotionally depleted, we could at some point start wondering what's the best option: staying and fighting like there's no tomorrow or pulling the plug on those amazing and yet unreachable people and let go, for good?
Are you afraid of regretting your next move? Totally understandable I have been there as well.
Before taking a decision, just be sure to ask yourself:
Before taking a decision, just be sure to ask yourself:
Am I actually prepared to keep investing into a relationship (of any kind) that is costing me a lot, not giving me what I need or desire and that over time is not going to grow in any way, it doesn't matter how much I would keep giving and doing my best?
If your honest answer is yes and you can do it without being heartbroken and becoming embittered, I cherish you and wish you the best.
Still, I am still convinced that you should pretend more. From yourself and from others.
This one is for Sonja, the special kind of friend you want to have on your side when you need someone great on your corner.
Tags: Relationships, Letting go, Toxic relationships, Love, Quotes
What to read next:
Visiting the blog for the first time? Aloha!
