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As a life coach, I help people make decisions that fit who they truly are and who they want to become
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Showing posts with label Mindset. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mindset. Show all posts

Monday, March 4, 2024

Coaching Monday: Actually, not a big deal

We behave, we talk, and we get stressed & upset as if everything, every day, would always be a big deal.
The truth is, most things are not a big deal at all. Not now, not in five minutes, not in five days, and definitely not in five months, or five years from now.

Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "What is actually not a big deal?"
[Do you want to make a game out of it?
How about finding every day one thing 
that is actually not a big deal?]

Realizing it is quite liberating, both short-term and long-term.
All those things that used to be a big deal in our imagination and are not... can help us get back mental space, energy, time, and attention for the very few things that truly are a big deal.

"What is actually not a big deal?" 

PS. I can start. Last week I was not able to post my Coaching Monday question for technical reasons. Unfortunate, and yet, in the big scheme of things? Actually not a big deal.
                                                    
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Letting go, Life design

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Monday, February 5, 2024

Coaching Monday: In need of a rethink

The big misunderstanding about rethinking something is the idea that rethinking something is like admitting that we were wrong before. Maybe sometimes it may be true, but it's not always the case.

Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "Where in your life do you need a rethink?"
[A rethink doesn't always have to be big or life-changing, 
but it can always change the quality of our lives]

A rethink is a new (mental, physical, emotional) place, a new page, a new chapter. A rethink is a chance to start fresh again thanks to different ideas, updated information, and/or improved tools.

What could be better than that?

"Where in your life do you need a rethink?"                                                

Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Rethink, New chapters, Life design

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Monday, December 18, 2023

Coaching Monday: The time to call it quits, sometimes

Once in a while, in the middle of something, we may hear a little voice from within saying something like "That's enough", "This doesn't make sense any longer", or "It's time to stop".
And yet, even if the voice may be right and calling it quits could be the most reasonable thing to do, we don't, more often than not out of fear.

Calling it quits has a bad reputation, as if calling it quits sometimes would automatically mean that we are quitters all the time and that quitting is what defines us. 
In reality, they are two different, separate things.

Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "When is it time to call it quits?"
[While reading this question, your mileage may vary.
All is possible, from "Many times a day" to "Never",
but I like to think that the answer is 
"When something doesn't feel right"]

Calling it quits can be a good decision.
Depending on the circumstances, it's about cutting losses, letting go, designing a healthier schedule for ourselves, setting boundaries, changing course, improving our time management, concentrating on the right priorities...

Calling it quits is not always about laziness or someone's character flaws. And yet, we are still afraid. 

"When is it time to call it quits?"    
                                                    
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Life design, Time management, Setting boundaries, Letting go

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Monday, November 20, 2023

Coaching Monday: Just lovely

Sadly enough, we often use the expression "just lovely" in a very sarcastic way, in order to convey quite the opposite.
"Isn't just lovely?!" we say while being actually upset, angry, stressed, even desperate, or all of these things at once.

Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "What about today has been just lovely?"
[That's the kind of question that could help you
establish a new daily ritual about finding something lovely
and being open about it]

Wouldn't it be better if we would get used to using the expression while truly meaning it and do our best to find daily something that is, indeed, just lovely?

What kind of difference would it make in our days and what would our focus be, this way?
"What about today has been just lovely?"
                                                    
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Emotional intelligence, Positive reinforcement, Focus

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Monday, November 6, 2023

Coaching Monday: Thinking ahead

Thinking ahead is important, but being able to be in the moment and reflect on the past is just as important.

We may want to be all in for playing the long game and to have as many steps as possible figured out as soon as possible... and yet finding a good balance between our thoughts on the future, the present, and the past is what can help us design the kind of life that will make us happy, thankful, and satisfied both short-term and long-term.

Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "How many steps ahead are you thinking right now?"
[How about three to five? You would prefer to have ten?
What's a good number for you?]

Thinking ahead is great, as long as we don't get lost in the process and forget about the present moment. 
"How many steps ahead are you thinking right now?" 
                                                    
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Thinking ahead, Life design

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Monday, October 16, 2023

Coaching Monday: The reward for staying curious

People are full of surprises, more than we expect them to be and way more than what we often credit them for. 
But in order to be able to see it and to let us surprise us, we have to give up control to a certain degree and stay curious instead, granting the people around us the benefit of the doubt, which is not always easy.

Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "Who surprised you today?"
[The more unexpected the surprise, the better.
And you can also be the one surprising yourself]

Staying curious and giving people around you the benefit of the doubt can be so rewarding! 
"Who surprised you today?"   
                                                    
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Curiosity, Strong relationships

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Tuesday, October 10, 2023

Coaching Monday: In only twenty minutes

Our to-do lists get longer and longer every day, and yet, somehow, we keep saying "I will take care of [insert a task you are dreading right now] at some point".

Why at some point? Why not today?

While hoping for the best and waiting for those magical days when we will have plenty of time to do everything and catch up with anything in order to get started, we are ignoring very powerful pockets of time where, in only twenty minutes, we can get things done and accomplish more than we would have expected or ever imagined possible.

Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "What can you get done in only twenty minutes?"
[An extra tip? Go for a small task that can be completed 
in only twenty minutes, start to finish:
tackle one of those each day (or most days)
and enjoy the positive domino effect they create]

Just twenty minutes of focused work can be like a miracle. Are you ready to try and accept the challenge?

"What can you get done in only twenty minutes?"      
                                         
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Time management, Productivity

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Monday, September 25, 2023

Coaching Monday: Young at heart

Age is just a number, they say. Sometimes it's true.

For this Coaching Monday, I would like to wish you a great last September week with a short, and yet very important question: 

Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "What can keep you young at heart?"
[Like with all important questions, there's no wrong answer.
What makes sense to you makes sense, period]

"What can keep you young at heart?"                                                  

Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Motivation, Young at heart

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Monday, September 11, 2023

Coaching Monday: A different kind of jackpot

Today's question should be a no-brainer.
If we know the answer to this question and live by it, almost nothing will be impossible.

Weekly question by life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "What gives you strength when you are very tired?"
[What's your secret weapon
and show what you are truly made of,
even if you are dead tired?]
    
The days can be long and tiring.
Knowing what motivates and gives us strength is like winning the jackpot.

"What gives you strength when you are very tired?" 

Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Strength, Resilience

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Monday, September 4, 2023

Coaching Monday: An unexpectedly difficult question to answer

Today's question is among my favorite ones because what appears to be an easy no-brainer or an inflated icebreaker for stale conversations is, actually, quite challenging to answer.

If money were no obstacle, what would you like to do? Not only for a day, a week, a somehow longer vacation... What would you like to do, read, discover, learn, and experience on a daily basis, and in the long run? What would you like to change for good, and what should stay the same?

Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "If money were irrelevant, what would you like to do?"
[That's also the perfect question to use 
for having a regular reality check all by yourself]

You would be surprised to discover that most people don't know how to answer. How about you?
"If money were irrelevant, what would you like to do?"    
                                                    
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Life goals, Time management

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Monday, August 28, 2023

Coaching Monday: Your most beloved treasure

If we talk about treasures, what's the first thing going through your mind?
The most apparent treasures may be material possessions, but everything and everyone can be a treasure: a strong relationship, our loved ones, a goal, our health, being resilient, a meaningful book, or the memories of a unique experience.


Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "What's your most beloved treasure and why?"
[The answer to this question may reveal 
what are your values and principles
and it can help you stay focused]

If someone asks about treasures, what's the gut answer that makes sense to you, and when was the last time you have been consciously thankful for it?

"What's your most beloved treasure and why?"  
                                                
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Thankfulness, Resilience, Personal values

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Monday, August 14, 2023

Coaching Monday: Someone to share a laugh with

We should all laugh more. Under challenging circumstances, on bad days, while dealing with what's difficult... we should laugh even more.

Laughing doesn't mean we don't take something seriously. More often than not, it means that we are resilient, open to finding the good sides of something unpleasant, and lucky to have someone to laugh with.

Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "Who is able to make you laugh effortlessly?"
[Another way to ask this question may be:
"Did you laugh in good company today?"]


"Who is able to make you laugh effortlessly?"   
                                                    
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Resilience, Sense of humor

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Monday, August 7, 2023

Coaching Monday: Taking your gut feeling seriously

Many people (myself included) swear by it, others seem to doubt its existence and/or efficacy, and others would love to use it more for big and small decisions, but have lost the connection to it (or never had one to begin with).
We can call it "gut feeling", "instinct", "sixth sense", "or intuition", and come up with plenty of other names regularly. 

If you ask me, that happens when we were not taught to listen to it in the first place, or when for whatever reason we decided, at some point, that we could not trust our gut, or that decision-making is all about facts and figures and other elements are not relevant. 

Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "How often do you take your gut feeling seriously?"
[Your mileage may vary, but if you ask me,
the answer to this question should be: "Daily"]

And yet, I am sure that each of us said at least once in life: "I should have trusted my gut. Deep down, I knew that something was off, but I ignored it".

The good news is that we can always learn to trust our gut more, step by step, one decision at a time. It may require some effort, and that's okay.
The secret is creating new habits and reinforcing them consistently: taking our gut feeling into account before making a decision, asking ourselves how we feel about it, then taking the answer seriously and, if possible, acting on it. Decisions taken this way are very seldom the ones we end up regretting.


"How often do you take your gut feeling seriously?"   
                                                    
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Gut feeling, Decision-making

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Monday, July 31, 2023

Coaching Monday: The unexpected side of worrying

Worrying about something has a bad reputation, but it's not always bad. 
Sometimes, being worried is precisely what we need. 

Acknowledging that something is bothering us is not a sign of failure, it's a sign of self-awareness and it may provide very useful feedback about us, our state of mind, our time management, and plenty of other essential factors that may require an honest audit and a reality check.

Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "What is bothering you right now and why?"
[The answer to this week's coaching question
can be something we don't want to think about
or something actually surprising and unexpected]

"What is bothering you right now and why?" 
                                                    
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Emotional intelligence, Time management

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Monday, July 3, 2023

Coaching Monday: Your next new beginning

One of my absolute favorite songs from the 90s, Semisonic's "Closing Time", says it all (while quoting the Stoic philosopher Seneca in the process): "Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end."
New beginnings are about letting go, moving on, and embracing change.

A new beginning can mean anything and represent very different things to different people, be huge or incredibly small and yet still meaningful, change lives or just give someone the courage to keep going, one step at a time.
          
Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "What's the next new beginning in store for you?"
[It can be something so tiny and "basic" that nobody else but you
would consider it a new beginning, but it doesn't matter,
as long as it is YOUR new beginning]

If you think about your present and your immediate future, what is the next new beginning you are excited about, and why?
"What's the next new beginning in store for you?"  
                                                    
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Closing Time, New beginnings, Dealing with change

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Friday, June 30, 2023

Coaching Friday: Always Be Tweaking

Seth Godin (and others) love to say "Always Be Testing", and it's a good life motto.

In the spirit of kaizen, we could also be saying "Always Be Tweaking": try something out, learn from the experience, change something, adjust, refine, try again, change a little bit more, and so on.

Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "What are you going to tweak next?"
[Every change, big or small, matters.
You never know what is going to have a significant impact]

Starting next week, Coaching Friday will become Coaching Monday. See you there! 

And you? "What are you going to tweak next?"    
                                                         
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Always Be Tweaking

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Friday, June 16, 2023

Coaching Friday: Your life lessons

Happy Coaching Friday, stunning lifelong learners!
This week's question is about what learning is all about - creating a "before" and "after", two versions of ourselves before and after we truly learned something that may have a long-lasting impact on our lives. 

If you search for "teach someone a lesson", you will get over 49,000 entries on Google.
It may be a common figure of speech, but "teaching someone a lesson" would most probably not do anybody any good at all.

Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "What's the latest lesson you learned?"
[It may be a lesson about yourself, about others,
about life, about your relationships, about your boundaries...]

Punishing, belittling, or rebuking others is not the way to go if you want someone else to actually learn something, and that's not only true about others, it's also true about us.
Others cannot teach us a lesson because we truly learn only what we are open and willing to learn. There are no lessons to be "taught", but plenty of lessons to be learned and cherished.

"What's the latest lesson you learned?"             
                                                    
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Life lessons, Self-improvement

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Friday, June 9, 2023

Coaching Friday: Performing under pressure

Happy Friday evening to everyone, amazing people!
Let's be honest for a minute: Being under pressure is often scary.

Being able to stay calm when the going gets tough? Having what it takes to think, to act in a meaningful way, and last but not least to perform well under pressure is not an easy thing to do.
And yet, most of the time, we can say afterward: "I did it". 
We make things work. We take things as they are, even when they are anything but perfect. We keep our cool and succeed, in our own way. 

Weekly question from life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "When was the last time you performed under pressure?"
[The last time you performed under pressure
you made yourself proud. It's great to celebrate it
and to remember it when you need it the most]

Some days the task is very scary, some days it's a little less scary, but most days we go for it anyway. Next time we're having a bad day, we should therefore ask ourselves: "When was the last time you performed under pressure?" 

As a nice reminder: 
Follow the Purple rabbit and read on »
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Friday, May 26, 2023

Coaching Friday: Dealing with bad news

Today's coaching question has a special place in my heart.
Not everything in life is rainbows and unicorns, and something we have to deal with a disheartening piece of information, something frightening in the news that hits too close to home, or maybe a health scare or a layoff.

Even if the habit of "doom-scrolling" may be considered way more common now than in the past, most people still tend to be afraid of bad news in any shape or form. Even more so when it feels "personal".
It doesn't matter whether we are confronted with it on a personal or professional level, or if we are talking about received feedback, discovering something (negative and) unexpected, or catching up at last with long-feared consequences of a situation or decision... 

Weekly question by life coach Azzurra Camoglio: "How do you deal with bad news?"
[What if we would see bad news as a chance
to get stronger and try something new in our lives?]

The way we deal with bad news is often revealing of how resilient we feel in the moment, how much we trust our ability to take care of ourselves and others in an unpleasant or scary scenario, and how confident we are that, eventually, we will be able to cope with something, learn from it, and make the most out of it.

"How do you deal with bad news?" often is a synonym for "Do you believe that you are able to grow under difficult circumstances?".
Is bad news always "forever bad" or is it a matter of perspective?              
                                                    
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Resilience, Growth mindset, Emotional agility

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Friday, May 19, 2023

Coaching Friday: The benefit of the doubt

The proverb "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me!" may feel safe and reassuring to many. We don't want to look like fools, be taken advantage of, or be tricked, right?

And yet sometimes, giving someone the benefit of the doubt is healthier and more productive long-term. Probably the most challenging part is deciding what we need in order to go for it, to take a risk, to be okay with the outcome, whatever it can be.      

"Who deserves the benefit of the doubt?"
[When in doubt, what do you think
and how do you interact with others?]

In your world, "Who deserves the benefit of the doubt?"         
                                                    
Tags: Coaching question, Self-coaching, Self-awareness, Self-reflection, Building trust, Relationships

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